AbstinentAnnie's Xanga

lol...(I can put my fobby stationary to good use)

Thu, 01 May 2008 05:18:40 GMT

I got this email from avi:

Hello everyone,
Yonatan loves getting mail in the mailbox. He checks everyday after school and is extremely upset \ disappointed if he doesn't get any, which is everyday. Today, he stormed off, sat down to pout for a few minutes. Truth be told it was quite funny and cute. We tell him that tomorrow will be the day, but the letter never comes.
Could you please send a short note, or have your kids send one, to him via snail mail when you have a moment?

LOL...hahaha it might not be as funny if you don't know him...

WHY WOULD HE THINK HE WOULD GET MAIL? haha YONATAN...yeah so he's definitely getting hello kitty sushi theme in a chococat envelope with some pop-up stickers in the next couple of days...

alright here's a big one

Wed, 30 Apr 2008 05:39:59 GMT

ugh, I'm a little ambivalent about xanga. I feel like it's fading out of fashion and it also kind of brings out the rambler/whiner in me but I still like the idea of a cyber journal, for typing purposes. ehhhhh time will tell.

but for now, there have been many thoughts and experiences accumulating that i really should have taken more time to reflect upon. I'll try to get some out here.

I met with Vicki today and she told me a REALLY poignant but also pretty cute story about my Yonatanush, who is amazing and literally like a little person, it's impossible to exaggerate like what a little person he is becoming - definitely, DEFINITELY not a toddler anymore, it's crazy. so anyway...

last night he apparently was like really hell to put to bed, and apparently avi got really angry with him and was yelling at him and told him that no one could come over at night anymore and they couldn't go out to dinner anymore and all this stuff, becuase yonatan was just not going to sleep. Avi would come in, turn off the light and leave and yonatan would run out of bed, turn the light on and slam the door. So V. was pretty mad too but she had a feeling that maybe there was something else going on than yonatan just not listening, so she went in and they talked (hehe) and it turns out that yonatan was turning on the light because he is scared of the dark (this is new, he wasn't before). He closed the door (also not normal for him to sleep with a closed door) because he DIDN'T WANT THE DARK TO COME IN HIS ROOM.

omg how CUTE. but also how amazing. what an amazing misunderstanding of light. and I think one that I and probably a lot of people frequently have. "In [Jesus] was life, and that life was the light of humanity. That light has shined in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it", in some translations "overcome". WHY do I act like my life is going to get dark, when I have Christ in my life????????? I should thank Yonatan for such an illustration. omg he's the best btw haha...

a couple weeks ago i was at arabic class (oy vey, I missed it today, don't even get me started. i had to work instead =( and one student, yossef, who is mexican and a convert to islam, kind of shared his testimony while we were waiting to go into class. he basically said that he saw his muslim coworker praying, and when he saw that his eyes filled with tears and he realized that he needed to change is life, and he became a muslim. when he told us that, two muslim girls in my class INSTINCTIVELY said "ma sha'ah allah" (literally "what God wanted", it's an expression of admiration), so I'm guessing that's like what you say when someone converts. But I was struck with the freedom with which Yossef shared, and with which these girls expressed joy at his faith, all infront of of me who they know is not muslim. furthermore, this all happened just because of the muslim witness at work. it's all very interesting...btw, i hate missing class esp that one =(

kind of along those lines but not really, today i went to go watch amy give a presentation about her work with the holocaust archive at ucsd. she mentioned the jehovah's witnesses victims of the holocaust, and one of the professors said 'it's funny that the jehovah's witnesses were killed for thinking that God was more important than the German state. They're the only Christians that thought that maybe it wasn't 'which might be more important, God or Hitler?'" HUH. a) the reference to JWs as Christians was interesting b) even though this is an exaggeration and he can't be serious these were the only ones, SAD that it's a possible reference. seriously like, as much as I love learning a positive attitude about church history - we really need to get our act together. obviously myself included...

um i have a lot more things I want to write about but I won't. it's late and I also could go on forever...

so, finally:

when God decided to make the most gem-like person on the face of the earth and create cuteness in human form, he hand-crafted someone SEVENTEEN SWEET YEARS AGO in the form of DAVID ARCHULETA.

haters BEWARE.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Fri, 25 Apr 2008 02:36:00 GMT

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

haha i am TOO EMBARRASSED TO EVEN POST IT but in a few days ASK ME AND I'LL TELL YOU BECAUSE I AM SOO EMBARRASSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ABBA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

on another note, I kind of feel like a mess. I called kelly kind of freaking out but everything has just been building for a while...it was actually nice to get away and come over to the libmans' and play with tush* as avi calls him.

(mid-post ps. i am so mortified right now)

actually, i can't really organize my thoughts right now. haha and in that state, i should really get back to my paper.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 03:32:43 GMT

very interesting...

this is my prof's blog (LOVE HIM)

(i'm thinking of forwarding it to prof p)

http://glenscorgie.com/2008/04/22/the-power-of-national-repentance/#more-34

weird day and a smaller part of something bigger i'll write about later

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 02:39:26 GMT

today i went to babysitting, and of course yuval was asleep for forever at the beginning (nice, but sort of awkward because i feel bad that amit is paying me). so amit went to the other side of the synagogue since i could be there with yuval and this lady comes and is like "I need someone who can read hebrew" and i said i could read it but i wasn't fluent and she said 'that's find it's just something little' so i said sure and the next thing she says is "i'm a channeler and i do some channeling, and I need to see if what i received is hebrew and if it means this" and she showed me like transliterated something (not hebrew) and then some like "may the earth be blessed with your words blah blah" something or other, and she wanted to know if what she channeled was that statement in hebrew. so I told her it wasn't and we talked for a little bit and she told me about her CHANNELING ADVENTURES. I was honestly at a loss as to what to do. and she was really nice and then asked me what I did and she told me she used to teach special ed and all this stuff...so then amit came and poor amit totally didn't know how weird it was going to be hahah...so amit and i talked to the lady for a while...

apparently her husband died like 20 years ago (this lady was pretty old) and then her channeling started...and so she's writing a BOOK of everything she's 'received'...

she also told us this hella long story about some church in new mexico with sand that heals people and how she likes to give it out to people, and there was a lot of talking about the cross from that church. and it was strange because she said she visits lots of different types of places of worship, not just synagogues, and she felt like jews should channel more and that God wanted her to like share this with everyone...but she was also like "you know I'm Jewish and I know with all my heart that I am Jewish, but so much of what I receive sounds like it's Jesus talking, because I hear a lot about communion and just a lot of things that makes me think it's Jesus..."

don't ask me how, but the subject changed haha...but i was really weirded out, and the lady left and amit and i kind of laughed and she was REALLY weirded out, me for different reasons (haha so she assumed that since it wasn't hebrew it was probably aramaic, and she's going to go to ucsd to ask a professor)

that's the story, I can't get into everything else. sighHHUHH. good thing ai is on tonight.

ugh so not in the mood

Tue, 22 Apr 2008 05:23:23 GMT

i really need to do at least one or two assignments tonight...i'm thinking a response paper due wed and then my arabic hw due tomorrow...REALLY NOT UP FOR IT...

but on another note: ugh i know i'm borderline creepy =( but, the female role is HINTING RIGHT? I just facebook walled (twice hahahahahahaha) the guy from my school, and quasi regret it. but i mean, what is the worst that could happen - and the way i see it, i won't see him until next monday and HOPEFULLY if it creeps him out he'll forget by then. yeah i'm pretty skilled at this...slash i suck. also I've thought it over, and I DO regret friending abdel. lol serina i hate you...

also, RYAN TOMORROW...SERIOUSLY....

okay i am def taking time that should be "doing some other things" as strongbad would say.

ugh why did I creep out the one single guy at my school haha...

ps. lots of thoughts about calling/mission/support/etc, but not tonighttt....

Monday, April 21, 2008

Mon, 21 Apr 2008 13:34:59 GMT

no time, but i am SO INSANELY PROUD of Jimmy Carter! both as an american but especially as an evangelical christian. Honestly it gives me a lot of reassurance and faith too in what God is doing in the Middle East, that an EIGHTY THREE year old former president who really doesn't HAVE to do anything would tour and talk with the most contentious people, even when his own countrymen as well as many other people internationally criticize him so harshly. I'd NEVER be able to do anything like that and i'm SO EXCITED and I think it shows a lot - plus, he ended up with a lot and a lot of good news from hamas, from syria. when he went to talk to hamas, condoleeza rice made this big statement "how could peace come by talking to the impediment to peace" - but how could NOT talking bring peace?! and i'm sorry THAT is the mentality that i CANNOT STAND living under and having broadcast to the rest of the earth in my name and in the name of the Church even, because people DO make those connections (because, implied in that statement "don't talk to the impediment to peace" is the suggestion to either: ignore, threaten, or attack, and everyone can guess from former/current actions what she really thinks it is...)

i'm grateful that ONE OF OUR OWN can be said to really try to do the dirty work of reconciling this situation. YAY CARTER. I know everyone hates him but I'm very happy, grateful, and reassured.

ets conference

Sat, 19 Apr 2008 04:14:04 GMT

i went to a conference today for the evangelical theological society and the theme this year was war and violence, and it was pretty interesting....

I don't have a ton and a ton to say. i bought a couple of books (haha and I got one for free for helping with registration) about peacemaking, ending war, etc etc etc but a few things that struck me most:

I WAS THE ONLY FEMALE OR LIKE ONE OF TWO AT LIKE EVERY SESSION. it DEFINITELY was weird to have SO FEW women and it definitely convinced me more of the need to go into academia, just to have some female representation/perspective

it was also SUPER WHITE. considering we are at war with ARABS and MUSLIMS and the theme was WAR and we live in SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA, the lack of diversity was also kind of worrysome.

I don't feel like summarizing a lot of the main ideas, but def a general consensus on just war and especially on the okay-ness of serving in the army, of going to war, of the fact that you belong not only to the kingdom of God but also to some earthly government....

i'm willing to buy it to an extent...I'm especially willing to buy serving in the army, because christians should be in all areas of society. i couldn't help but think - okay so if we were in iraq, and we were iraqi christians, would the message be the same?! and if that's the case, how is that possible? how is it condoned that christians all across the globe can join entities that fight each other and also kill people? honestly it's hard for me to totally swallow...I think for that reason, more non-white voices would have been helpful. I wanted to ask "would you give this same advice to iraqi christians?" but I didn't...

i got to do registration with CALEB. very cute, good sense of humor, and seems like a strong person. God only knows if he's single, or will be next week hahaha. the big turn off is that he is SUPER SUPER SUPER busy. would i ever want to be with someone that busy? he's also like THE big man on campus, and everyone knows/loves him because he's the dean's assistant, so I think it would be hard to REALLy become his friend because he's so "popular" haha. so the big question is, do i facebook friend him.

actually it was funny i was talking with amit and we talked about facebook somehow, and she said 'you know, i heard it's possible to see who looks at your profile' (!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and i said 'oh how scary, esp because of my stalker tendencies" and she said "no, I think it's good, especially with single guys, because it least it gives them a hint that they know you're looking" haha oh those israelis...a lot fiestier (lol when I told vicki the nate story I told her it was really funny, and she was so disappointed and she was like "annie it's not funny" hahaha) along a similar line, i found out that the verb "to match" in the romantic sense has the same root which makes the word for "matchmaker" in hebrew but is also the same word for STAPLER. Because I knew one form of "match" in hebrew, and I didn't know the other verb "to match" in the romantic sense - the romantic one, being related to the stapler, implies making two people literally joined together/matched together, like a stapler with paper. so interesting!

UGH PRINCETON WEEKEND USA but yay for Amy's bday tomorrow. And yay for passover...

time to read...kali i think i'm gonna eat your popcorn =/

Friday, April 18, 2008

Fri, 18 Apr 2008 04:22:59 GMT

ugh yuvali!!! he's so chewy!!!!!!

"he became as we are so we can become as he is"

this is the sort of 'motto' for the Eastern Orthodox Church, which has existed for about as long as Christianity. I didn't really know it until this quarter, but they have a slightly different idea of salvation. It's still the same thing in most senses, but as we see as being 'justified' (declared innocent from guilt) and 'regenerated' (receiving a new nature) they see as a little bit deeper, and to the eastern orthodox salvation is called "theosis" or...ugh I forget the two other words haha, I think one is deification. It's basically that motto - we become saved and we literally take on God's nature. Through God's indwelling us, our wills, our feelings, grow more and more to be like him, because he became like us.

in our theology class we also talked about the Holy Spirit and Pentecostalism and the Charismatic movement. REALLY. INTERESTING. I didn't know that Pentecostals are pushing 500,000 MILLION PEOPLE and growing. that is HALF A BILLION, it's a substantial chunk of the world's population. I had no idea. There had always been something off-putting to me about pentecostalism, but after taking a closer look I definitely don't think it's worth demonizing at all. Basically they see the difference between getting saved and the famous being 'baptized in the holy spirit' (and then the whole issue of, this in some cases means tongues/could mean tongues/has to mean tongues blah blah blah). But definitely the idea of experiencing the Holy Spirit in a new and tangible way is an important element. And we read an article by a non-charismatic conservative Christian, who basically realized that the Bible was in some ways not enough. I've ALWAYS put almost ALL my weight on the Bible, and in a way I'll probably always put as much weight on it, as the thing that gets the most say in my life spiritually, and the thing that speaks the strongest. But this guy was talking about when his little son went through a rare cancer, and basically how he needed the closeness and intimacy with God that you just can't have by reading a book. And that's when he realized how important the Holy Spirit is....

the other thing we learned about the Holy Spirit is that it is the modern-day EMMANUEL. At this point in history, the Holy Spirit is God with us. He is a person! NOT a force to be controlled, or a vague presence or an idea, but a person, but one that lives within us, closer than we'll ever be able to be to anyway. And he's there to be related to.

And for a seminary with mostly semi conservative evangelicals, my prof was trying to get us to realize that most of our traditions carry an implicit pessimism that not ALL Christians have had (see: the 500,000 mil pentecostals, the 2,000 years of eastern orthodox). scorgie summed up how probably most of us think - yes, you will grow in the spirit, but don't really get your hopes up, because we have that sinful nature. we put a lot of stock in our sinful nature, when really we have brothers and sisters that have traditionally put more emphasis on the indwelling of God. and it's definitely sort of an encouragement to look at some other traditions and look at how the way I am used to thinking isn't THE way.

a little bit of reflection on a little bit of this week's material...........

on another note:

JIM AND PAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmm

SF:DHOICHSDPOICBPISUWRESHIELNKVJNSDCSLJSNLMNSKJDHREIUSHBPIUBCIBESLKJSEBLCE

Friday, April 18, 2008

Fri, 18 Apr 2008 00:52:53 GMT

hehehehehehe....it's my babies...OMG LOOK HOW USELESS...(the one on his tummy was probably about 2 min from crying, which is what he does a lot...)

and this is yuvali, but I don't know how to rotate it haha...UGH HE'S SO CUTE...i'll try to get a picture of him laughing/smiling, which is what HE does a lot...ughhh what a cutie....

the other day amit was handing him off to me, but she kept kissing him and she said to me as like literal instructions haha: "just kiss him as much as you can"

ughhhhh the sweetest........

also I found out amit is like not a whole lot older than me (she's 28, younger than benny...) I think I just assumed she was a lot older because she has two children (also because her husband looks kind of old, which it turns out he is - 35. not so bad, but it def explains why I thought they were older). also i love amit...

also I need to get back to my essay/fighting the temptation to go to golden spoon...OOYYY IT'S SO STRONG